Today is always the first day of the rest of your life.

I know I've been MIA for quite a while now, but I'm back. I'm not sure anyone actually reads this silly blog, but I'm back. More for myself than anyone else...but I feel this is a good venue to document this next phase in my life.

The last few months have been a huge roller coaster. From NoMT to Ireland, from depression to getting cast in Cripple of Inishmaan, from not getting called back for Streetcar to realising I am in charge of my own life and destiny.

I have had so many ups and downs and graduation is sneaking up. I'm not sure if I'm excited or scared. All I know is I feel like I have been hiding from this transformation that has been trying to take place in my life for a couple years. I'm ready to be love. I am ready to stop looking for love in friends, guys, theatre, food...I know now that the only way to love is to BE love. There is so much energy, love, creativity and passion just waiting to be born within me. I know this all sounds very woo-woo and naïve, but I just feel this last week the world has been screaming at me: "Clare! Wake up! The world is ready for you to embrace it!" And I am ready.

So tomorrow, hell, RIGHT NOW, I am saying YES to life. Life is here for us to embrace, to live! I've been feeling very depressed that I didn't fall in love with someone in college, that I'm graduating without ever having a true relationship, but today I realized something...maybe I didn't fall in love with a man, but I fell in love with MYSELF.

I know I will find the right man at the right time. The right people have always turned up in my life when I have needed them, and they will continue to do so. All I can do is love myself and treat myself with respect.

I am ready to be my best self. I am getting my wings ready. April 1 is really the first day of the rest of my life. And how fitting that it is the anniversary of when I met and adopted Pooka. Three years. Three wonderful years. And three years from now I have a feeling I will be marking the three year anniversary of when I made the most important change in my life.

So here goes! To life. To love.

Namaste.